Batman: The Blackening
by THE PETE PETERSON EXPERIENCE
Summary: Batman enters a dark world filled with evil after he makes a terrible mistake.
1. Chapter 1

Batman The blackening

Chapter 1 The Dark Knight Highses

Batman threw his batarang, piercing the joker right in his fucking face. joker's goons ran away because they were scared, doing parkoor moves upsides the buildings and shit.

"Ouch batman." joker said. it missed though because joker had a fake head in front of his real face, which was his face.

"you'll have to try harder than that." batman said.

"No." jokayher said as he pulled out a joint and smoked it.

"what is that...mairiwanna?"

"wanna? I have enough for two."

"fuck joker, I'm all about Justice and shit. I can't be fucking smokking weeds."

"but weed should be legal lol. don't you think. It never fucking killed no one."

"shit." batman said. joker was making a lot of good points.

"come over to my place and we'll hang out." joker said.

"ok"

batman went to joker's place, and he was scared. because he didn't know what jkoer was up to. because joker is one scary mofo

"joker you're won scary mofo." batman said.

"here play xbox"

"what's xbox"

"it's like a video game. it plays video games."

"cool. like a batarang or something."

joker put in deluxe battle modern star wars of duty 2K13, which was a fucking legit crossover game. batman really liked it.

"you're a pretty cool guy joker. I'm sorry about all that shit."

"it's cool bro. smoke?" joker gave batman the joint.

"yeah let me put this in my batabong." LOL

He did and smoked it. it was really cool and he got really high. he was so high they couldn't stop laughing and joker was more than a little bit concerned because he laughs a lot and batman was almost laughing as much as joker did, which is a lot usually.

"joker this shit tiz." batman said as he scrumped himself.

"Heah"

"i feel like I have to take a dump...but i don't. is that pot?" batman meant to say is that FROM pot but he was really high so his words didn't work right when he spoke them from his mouth.

"No you actually did just shit batman. all over my floor." he did. it was gross.

"Lol" they both said laughing out loud and saying the letters too.

"Shit joker now that we're friends i have to tell you my secret. do you want to know my secret identity."

"not really."

"Come on...you sure?"

"yeah"

"Really?"

"you can tell me if you want but it doesn't matter for our friendship if you do or you don't. i don't partickualy need to hear you tell me your batman identity."

"I'm batman."

"yes but you were telling me your secret identity."

"which is?'

"i don't know you were going to tell me it."

"oh"

"but I don't need you to."

"I will tho"

"then do it faggot."

"I'm...BRUCE WANE."

"that's pretty fucking coolen batman. that explains how you get rich guy stuff. and you look like bruce wane."

"yeah because I am him."

"hey do you want to get ice cream or something?"

"yeah I got the munchies."

"ok"

they went to get ice cream. but when they got to the icream shot, it fell apart and a bunch of joker's goons were theyre.

"What is this? A haircut?" batman said.

"no batman! I know your secret now! and all these guys are gonna reveal it to the daily bugle! and then everybody will know that batman is bruce wane and is a stoner douchebag!"

the goons took pictures of batman as he started to cry. he knew he made a big fucking mistake getting high and telling joker his secret. the goons ran away to the newspaper, and commisioner goron and barambara gordon showed up.

"batman is it true?" they said.

batman couldn't even answer he was crying so much. snot and tears streamed down his batsuit.

"batman, I'm sorry to say this but you're fired from being batman." gordon said.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" batman screamed. 


	2. Chapter 2

batman the 2 of the blackening part 2: chapter two: the second chapter

a/n: I'm feeling really sad tonight because I tried to get jessica back and fuck she's still a bitch but I love her. baby if your reading this I fucking miss you and I want you back so fucking shittily badly fuck FUCK FUCK FUCK!

so this chapter is going to be really sad because of her.

batman was fired from being batman.

"FUCK!" he said as he ran to the batcave. there was a present there form him.

"Who's this?" he said as he opened it with a batabling. it says 'from your pal joker, here's some fucking weed" and the bag box was filled with mariwonna.

"fuck I shouldn't..."

then he remembered how fun video games were. So he got his credit card and fucking ordered every video game ever.

"FUCK THIS IS SO MUCH FUN!" he said as he played NINTENDOMASTERBLASTERFUCKER for 360.

he saw the dope dope and said fuckit to himself and fucked it, then smoked it. it made him real happy. then alfred showed up.

"Bruce what the shitting fuck is this blow. are you fucking getting stoned like the telegrammick newsaramelpaper said?" alrfred said as he threw pennys at broos because his name is pennywerth.

"yeah I am."

"but b-b-b-b...I'm britisch" alfred said. "But fuck bruce you shouldn't dope andy more of dat doping dope. it's bad for you. you got fired from being batman."

"I AM BATMAN!" batman said as he jump kicked alfred in the face. he sat on top of him and punched the shit out of alfred until he was almost dead. but then he stopped, and dumped him out of the window. alfred fell down into a pillow and almost died.

"fuck I gotta smoke some more of this joker smoke." batman said as he smoked some more. it made him even more happy.

"batman NOOO Wha lut the funking shut is fucking wrong with you motherfucker?! SMOKING?!" the boy wonder said.

"ROBIN?!" batman said. this is kid robin okay.

"put that shit down, we have to fight crime."

"but they fired me from being batmaaaan." bruce wane said.

"who gives a damn. batman aint a job you can be fired from, it's a responsibility batman."

"fuck you robin you're a dick."

"come on batman I'll take you to see a movie."

"i wanna play video games and get high more." batman was so high the white parts of his eyes were all red.

"fuck your shit. play fight crime with me instead. it's like kincect game but in real life."

"fuck if it's a video game okay."

batman and robing went to stop a bank from being stolen. penguin was snorting crack off of a penguin. a real fucking penguin. he was in a helicopter too so it was quite tricky.

"fuck it's batman."

"and ronbin!" robin snaid.

"you can't stop me though. the bank is already been stolen."

"Wait where's bruce I mean batman?!" robin said, because batman was gone left. he went to the nearby movies where batman was.

"fuck just give me extra fucking butter. like a fuckload of butter. I want the greasy pieces of corn to be happy in my mouth and tummy ; )" batman said as he kept winking at the hot chick at the movie theater who's name is jessica. (A/N: jessica if you reading this I really miss the discounts you geve me at movies and I remembered that you worked there still. I wrote this batman story because I saw you there when I saw dkr and I miss you. please come back to me I'm so sad and lonely without you)/

"wow that girl is pretty" robin said.

"fuck yes. FUCK." batman said as the popcorn burned his hand. but then his hand froze.

"mister freeze?!" he said.

"no batman it's me robin. I used freezie jell to stop you from using your hands to jack off and smoke pot. you're oding what the joker wanted. fuck that guy and his hair."

"no I'm really ssad and I need it." batman ran away screaming and crying and sticking his unfrozen hand down his pants.

batman went to the top of the batcave and looked down.

"fuck I'm really quite sad"

and then he jump, did he die? find out next time 


	3. Chapter 3

chapter 3

batman gets his groove back

batmon fell but landed in a pile of baby whales. he killed a few but he survived.

"why did I live fucking through this I am no longer even batman."

"could you use a hand sir?" soenme said. batman looked up and saw a wal mart greeter. the bright light behind him made her loook like an angle.

"no I know what I have to do now."

he went to the applications desk.

"hello I'm batman and I'd like to work here now.

"ok lol" the gorky dork said as he gave batman the contract. "just don't smoke more weed on the job my boss doesn't play that shit."

"fucking fine."

batman was really good at his job. he wore the wal mart clothes over his batman clothes. he stocked really good.

"batman it's really U" somebardty said.

"posion ivy what are you doing here"

"buying poison"

"oh"

"aren't you going to fight me ror some shit"

"no i can't i'm batman but i'm fired from being batman"

"sucks to be you"

"yeah"

"see you later"

batman got really sad because poison ivy was so pretty and now everyone knew he was brooce wane.

"FUCK!"

"batman it's really you" somebardty said.

"scarecrow what are you doing here"

"buying scarecrow"

"oh"

"aren't you going to fight me or some shit"

"no i can't i'm batman but i'm fired from being batman"

"sucks to be you"

"yeah"

"see you later"

joker showed up wearing a weird tuxedo with wizzledy gizmos shooting out every second. it was really scary and the greeter died from being so scared.

"no joker you killed them. how could you"

"batman come play games with me again. we can play blops 2."

"that sounds really cool but Joker your being a dick."

"I am shit sorry son." joker said "but not fucking really."

"Fuck you then I'm done playing games. I'm happy here."

"fine do you sell condoms here I don't want to give harely stds."

"no"

"oh"

"shit get the fuck out of here joker before larry sees me" larry is batman's boss.

"batman what did I tell you about being batman." larry said. he was really skinny but had a really fat ass. he was knocking shit over with it as he turned around to batman.

"no larry I'm sorry I told him to leave"

"I'm sick of this shit batman or should I say broose. Fuck you and get out of you're fired."

batman screamed and ran away crying and climbed to the top of wal mart.

"fuck this time I'm gonna jump."

and he did, but somebody grabbed him and it was a mystery person and he couldn't see who it was.

"who're'you?"

"batman it's me...YOU?"

"whuh?" but batman woke up as he fell asleep while he was falling and crashed into the ground. then a car ran him over. the ambulance came and took him away and everyone was really sad even joker who cried and cried.

will batman survive? 


	4. Chapter 4

Batman Chapter feyor.

"Bane fucking returns:"

Everyone was really scared for batman because he was maybe dying. joker brought more flowers and cries so hard he peed himself.

"shit I didn't want this why the fuck did he jump" joker said.

"I am the doctor. you bad guys get fuck out here."

then Bane showed up.

"ohhh it is the bat man. he is in darkness i was born in"

"shit who the fuck is this guy" joker said. he was really scared.

batman was picked up by bane and bane flung him accross the room. it woke him up.

"until next time fucker" bane said.

batman got all sad that he jumped off of wal mart and ran away even though everyone had forgiven him for being bad and roboing was really sad that he left. except alfred he was still pissed. oracle wasn't there tho

batman hid in the sewers.

"GRROROROOROROOOO!" he cried.

batman punched the walls and shit. he climbed out and felt bad. batd. like bad but a bat.

he crawled all the way to the batcave because he felt so bad. he trained and trained and trained until he had a new move.

"now I can be batman again."

he went to the bad place in gotham and the bat man saw robin there.

"robin bwahhhh I'm so sorry" batman said.

"fuck you batman." nobrin said.

"NO." batman said.

"ok"

"plz help me be bat men agen."

"nahh"

"why not"

"you jumped and pussied out back there."

"but I got fired from wal mart. It was really important to me."

"ok batman But no more smoking the dope aiight."

"shit yes robing let's stop bane"

"ok he's over there."

Bane was fucking a building with his fists by destroying it.

"hey fuckhead" batman said and punched bane's mask off. bane put it back on.

"fuck you batman. FUCK YOU."

batman had been training for this for a longest time.

"I call this...the BAT MOBILE CURTSY!"

He grabbed the edges of his cape with each hand. he dipped his knee and did a curtsey, but a manly one, one only fucking batman could do. bane looked at him like he didn't know what the fuck he was seeing because bane didn't know what the fuck he was seeing. it was the most beutiful curtsy anyone ever did. then the batmobile hit bane.

"ahh fuck"

bane died.

"shit. I kileld a guy. NOOOO!" batman said and ran away again!

"batman wait no!" robin said. he could see bane was NOT DEAD?!

band got up and started punching the shit out of robin like he did to the building. robin would die if batman didn't get back, but batman wasn't coming back. 


	5. Chapter 5

bamtan chleptehch fun the fourth fifth sixth chapter

a/n: to all you jackasses sayin I'mma troll fuck off, i could kick your ass. send me your address you pricks. fuck you. i know I'm not very good at spelling but my mom rites the titles and deskrepchans for each story. so FUCK OFF. makes me think of my ex because she help lme wrate thame.

robin died. batman didn't come back. he ran away into the dark night (lul) cryin and shit.

robin didn't really die though. because he was saved by...THE JOKER?!

nah. that'd be cool though. robind giked band in the fucking face and killed him.

"oh no batman ran away." Ronbin sant. he used a bat kick to fly out of the jetpack rockets into the batmobile fuckerdoodle shit.

but...something really bad was happening inside...robin couldn't see it. he needed batman now more than ever.

Batman stood on a ledge, and picked up his bat belt bat man.

"your my only friend their just jealoose. boo hoo hoo." batman said as he cried. he throwed the belt onto the city and it died.

"there all my friends are dead. now no one will miss me when I dies."

"someone would miss you." a voice said from behind him. two voices.

it was the joker and aldfred.

"wut are you doiING HERE?" batman said as he slipped and almost fell. someones hands held him up. it was harley quinn on a jetpack

"you can't die broos we need U' she said. batman punched her in the face and her jetpack broke and she fell of the building.

"come on man I thought we were cool." joker said.

"YOU FUCKING RUINED MY LIFE JOKER. IF I NEVER FUCKING SMOKED THE WEED I WOULDNTA GIVENG AWAY MY SEACREAST IDENATDY AND FUCKED EVERYTHING UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP"

"wow someone's a little faggot" alred said.

"yeah lol" joker said.

"no on gives a shit bros wane. they think your legit shit, your kush is cash, your ass is raw kick ass mass, your face is chiseled like mount rushmore, your costume is the shizz, your hotness makes straight guys jizz, I hope you understand, please understand, the world aint what you make with your hands, it's what you find in others, the love, the sad, the glove, the bad, everything gets ok one day broose, it'll be easy for youse, because you're the best. the best. the best. the best. the best. I love you my master, I would give you a blaster, the world needs you, without you it'd be blue, the cloudy sky will be less gray one day, the light in your eye, shit, that's the reason why I, wake up, yeah, wake up in the morning, get out of bed, get the tools from my shed, because of you. the best, that's you. broose, you're you, and the best is the best becasue of you." alfred said muscially to a beat. he rapped.

batman agreed and smiled bigly. jokair and aldread did too, even biglyerly.

"thank U I feel better."

"let's get robin and have some ice cream." joker said.

"should I call mr freez?" alref said. they all laughed a lot and smiled bigger. joker smoked a cig with pot as they walked down the stairs and were smiling happy when they got outside. robin was waiting by the bartmobnile, grinnin.

"killed bane" he said.

"cool" joker said.

but then...a beep beeped. beep beep.

"The fuck is that?" batman said.

beep.

"shit.' joker said nad ran. alfred ran with him becuz he wanted a bong hit and joker had the best shit.

"i'm sorry broose. you're a crimbinal. and so is he. he desrve this."

"comblishoner gordan?" batman said.

it was. he hit a switch on the remote in his hand, with the hand that wasn't holding it. it beeped.

beep.

the batmobile blew into a million pieces, as gordan laffed and laffed, flying away on a jetpark. robin was dead. batman saw his body explode into bloody millions of pieces.

"ROBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNN NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU UUUUUUUUUUUUCKINGNGOGNONOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" batman's face was scrunched up so bad from the sadness and angerness that his eyes bled, his teeth broke, and his face caved in a little bit. his costume ripped and he was in nothing but his undies, bloody and angry that his friend had died forever. he pounded the groung fucking hardly and toughy with energy coming down from all the energy in the sitty, turning off all the lights, and he pooped himself with blood diarea from the anger, killing a few people behind him. the energy was now all in broose, and he couldn't do anything with it because he had no clothes. he flewed into the air in a big ball of energy and shit, literal shit, and blood, as his body started to combine and smallen, and he cried. the city would be destroyed if nobody saved him, and nobody could. nobody could save him from death because death wuz what he wanted. he cried and cried and cried as the energy grew and gerw and fucking grewd. 


End file.
